Celebrating Moms, Celebrating You - Avalyn Gao @thecuriousmama
It’s nearing Mothers’ Day and we are so happy to be celebrating all the moms out there. In this pandemic season, it has not been an time for moms as we adapt to new working environment aka Work from Home, dealing with Home Based Learning and some moms delivering in hospitals without their partners beside them. While we have now moved to a better situation with the opening up of Phase 3, it is still challenging emotionally and mentally as well for many of us. The awareness of Mental Health care and self care has never been more important. So moms, please take very good care of yourselves and know that a healthy mom makes a better mom for the kids. Know that you are not alone in how you feel. This Mothers’ Day, we have the pleasure of featuring Ava in this Mothers’ Day Feature to share some of her motherhood journey. Enjoy!
Ava is a life & parenting coach that help mothers who are feeling frustrated & overwhelmed to find clarity & direction in their lives and enjoy parenting their young children.
She share tips on achieving peace, presence & purpose in life & parenting using her knowledge & training in Mindfulness & connection based parenting approaches – Montessori & Circle of Security Parenting on her IG @thecuriousmomma
- What is your favourite part of Motherhood?
My favourite part of motherhood is to spend time with my son and my husband in nature. We often go to the beach and parks to enjoy the beauty of nature and have a picnic there during the weekend.
One of my greatest joys about being a mother is to see my son grow into his unique character and personality. I see my role as a facilitator, guiding in his interests and strengths as he learns more about himself and the world around me. I love the concept of “Roots & Wings” and it is my goal as a parent to raise my children in a way that they feel they have a strong sense of self and of belonging and at the same time instilling in them through unconditional love, trust and respect the confidence to spread their wings and fly.
- What is your most memorable event in this motherhood journey so far?
The most memorable event was to hear my son call me “mama”. I think it is a blessing to raise my own child, and build a relationship with him that allows him to feel safe, soothed and secured when I am around.
- Describe your relationship with your mother and what lessons you have learnt/implemented into your own motherhood journey.
My mother has taught me that a mothers’ love is unconditional and cooking food is a way of showing care & love for the children and the family. Despite the early working hours that she used to work as a teacher, she always cooks lunch that I can easily heat up after school before she heads to work.
As a mother now, I enjoy cooking for my child and my husband as I see it as a way of showing my love, and I really enjoy seeing my child eat happily. There are times that I wish I can be better cook, and I’ve come to realise that it’s the memories around the dining table – the conversations, laughter and jokes that are more important than the quality of the food served on the table.
- What is the toughest part of being a mother thus far for you?
Constant overwhelm and guilt while trying to juggle multiple commitments, being present with my child and having time for myself & with my husband – while feeling sleep deprived.
I think motherhood has taught me so much as self compassion and kindness. We cannot pour from an empty cup, and it is not just sacrificing your needs or feeling unfulfilled all the time. Because when we do pour from an empty cup, our relationship with our loved ones – children, spouse, family will be impacted.
For me, embracing mindfulness in life & parenting has fundamentally changed my mindset about motherhood & my life purpose, and brought me the peace and contentment that I desired .
- What inspired you to create and design these Affirmation Cards
I love inspirational quotes and have found strength in reading and reflecting on them at the different stages in life. When I became a mom, I collated a series of quotes and designed them for my own usage. I printed a small quantity to gift to my friends, and they suggested me to make this as a product to remind other mothers on the importance of self love and compassion in this journey of motherhood.
- What is your advice for a new mom out there?
You don’t need to do everything perfectly well all the time. Things might seem to slow down a lot in the first few weeks when the baby is at home, slow down and just be with your baby. Our presence with our child is the best present that they can have.
Honour your needs and own your choices. You are the mother of your child and you have the power to make decisions & choices for your child, you and your family – whether it is breastfeeding vs formula milk, sleeping arrangements, food. Trust your mother’s instincts and ask for help when you need it. Connect with people who can hold space for you and provide an listening ear, and meet fellow mummies who understand your challenges.
Get a copy of the Affirmation Cards for Mothers that Ava has come up with to encourage moms out there.
With the purchase, you will receive a free eBook of “10 Days of Journal Prompts” (worth USD15) that will support you in using these cards to discover more about yourself and your parenting.